Bridal to you

THE BRIDE Marielle Diaz
THE GROOM John Newland
THE DATE May 12

But Marielle was resourceful: she told their mutual friend Ben Holland she thought John was cute,
with the intention that he would pass along the secret to John. Brian, who would later become
the couple's best man, took the hint -- and so, apparently, did John. The couple dated throughout their
college years and later became engaged

St. John‘s Episcopal Church, accessible by a one-way dirt road, is perched on a hill overlooking the valley. The peeling white paint, green tin roof, and all-wood interior offered a cozy, intimate setting for Marielle and John‘s short, personal ceremony.

"It was fun to come up with vows we felt really expressed how we felt about each other," says Marielle. The bride and groom asked their mothers to do short readings of their choosing. "John‘s mother read a passage from the Bible and my mother read an Apache poem," says the bride.

For the reception, the rustic interior of the barn was transformed into a light and airy wonderland: "We used a lot of glassware, candlelight, and organza table linens," says Marielle.

Marielle and John took their first dance to "I Wanna Be Loved By You" a la Marilyn Monroe, a song that‘s not really "theirs" but one that they both enjoy.

"The location truly decided the dress," says Marielle. "Given the rusticity of the surroundings, so many of the more popular designs would have looked decidedly out of place." With contrast in mind she chose an ethereal gown by Pronovias that was embellished at the bodice and had long, flowing bell sleeves made of gauze. Marielle felt a veil would have been too dramatic, and instead wore a tiara made of fresh white flowers.

Find out who does what on your wedding day in our guide to wedding etiquette

For many brides the idea of delegation will be a welcome one, but wedding etiquette can be controversial. To find out who does which job and what favours are appropriate to ask, follow our guide on traditional wedding etiquette to ensure your wedding day is favour-full and offence-free!

The ushers
•Attend the groom’s stag night and may offer input into the groom’s party’s outfit choices
•Welcome guests at the ceremony
•Organise the ceremony seating
•Distribute details of the service
•Escort the groom’s parents and bride’s mother to their seats
•Mingle with guests once the ceremony is over strong

The bridesmaids
•Chief bridesmaid is leader of the pack and not usually a child
•A married chief bridesmaid is referred to as matron of honour
•Brides choose younger girls as flower girls
•Help to choose your dress
•Attend dress fittings (and be patient for as long as it takes!)
•Arrange the hen night and any other planning you need help with
•Carry the crucial ‘bride kit’ on the day itself, which might include make-up (specifically lipstick, powder and blotting sheets), tissues, safety pins, paracetamol (should the bubbly begins to take its toll) and glue for any nail or eyelash extensions
•Walk down the aisle behind you and hold the bouquet when you reach the altar

The best man

•Does a recce of the bride and groom’s chosen ceremony and reception venues
•Helps to choose the ushers
•Organises the stag do (and makes sure the groom returns with both eyebrows intact)
•Assists with arranging transport and, crucially, getting the groom to the venue on time and in one piece
•Checks that he has the rings on the day
•Makes sure order of service sheets have been brought to the venue to hand to guests as they arrive
•Checks he has the rings again…
•Delivers a fantastic speech at the wedding reception
•Toasts the bride and groom
•He may serve as toast master in place of a professional one. For toast master duties, click here.
•Arranges honeymoon departure

The toast master
•Greets the bride and groom when they arrive at the wedding reception
•Directs guests around the venue and to any facilities
•Assists the photographer in gathering members of the bridal party
•Announces the entrance of the bride and groom and escorts them to the top table
•Announces the cutting of the cake
•Introduces the speeches and makes sure they are conducted in the correct order

THE PARENTS
Sometimes a parent’s involvement can verge on meddling, so make sure their roles are clear-cut from the beginning and avoid any pre-wedding family fall-outs. Here’s what you can traditionally expect from parents.

Bride’s parents
•Organising and paying for a wedding traditionally fell to the bride's parents so the mother and father of the groom used to have less of a say. Yet this custom has changed over the years, particularly when both sets of parents are contributing to the cost
•If the bride's parents are hosting the wedding the invitations should be sent out in their names
•The bride's mother usually helps with the organisation, taking some of the pressure off the bride by going on dress and bridesmaids’ fittings with her, helping with the guest list and so on
•The bride's father usually accompanies the bride to the church or venue and escorts her down the aisle
•The bride's father makes the first speech, thanking all the guests for coming and proposes a toast to the bride and groom

Groom’s parents
•The groom’s parents may help out towards wedding costs
•Either or both sets of parents may sign the register
•At the reception if there's a receiving line, both sets of parents will also meet and greet guests